“If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.” James 1:5
What a wonderful verse! I know I desperately need wisdom in becoming the wife and mother I strive to be, and I also realize I would never get it in and of myself. Thankfully God has promised to give wisdom to anyone who asks!!
Find your life in his.
Those are just five words, but oh what wisdom and challenge they hold! As I’ve mentioned before I lived in the same house from the time I was born to the time I was married at the age of 19. I grew up within minutes of both grandparents and 95% of the rest of my extended family. Birthday and holidays were filled with all kinds of relatives and celebrations. I deeply, truly love Wyoming and the mountains and the West.
I never, ever expected, or wanted, to be a career military spouse. I wanted to live in Wyoming, raise my kids close to where I grew up so they could know the same closeness with their grandparents and extended family that I did growing up. I wanted to be able to take them camping in the summer, hunting in the fall, and skiing and sledding in the winter. I wanted them to go to the same church where I was saved, baptized, graduated, and got married.
When we were dating and Bob was considering the military I fought him tooth and nail. I told him I was absolutely not marrying a Marine. Finally he decided to join the Coast Guard and I decided that was acceptable. He could serve 4 years, get it out of his system, and then go work for his Dad in the Sherrif’s department in the towns we grew up in and we’d all live happily ever after.
Obviously, that’s not how our lives played out. But truthfully I’m a very happy and proud military wife. It didn’t happen automatically. When Bob told me he was getting back in for good I can’t say I smiled and was just all giggles about it. But with God’s help I’ve learned to let go of how I wanted my life to play out and instead accept what is best for my husband, best for my family, and what God’s will is for our life. As I mentioned earlier in this study, there are still times I really struggle. There are still times when I find out we might be moving somewhere and I rant and rave and pout. With God’s help, though, I’m happy to say that the majority of the time I’m happy and content. It would be far too easy for me to put on a “oh woe is me” attitude. I miss my family, I miss my friends. I’ve been living for the past 3 years in an area I don’t really enjoy and we haven’t been able to find a supportive church family. My only friend here moved away, and now I have no one to baby sit, no one to go visit, no one to help or recieve help from. Because I’ve been moving every 2 years since I got married no where has felt like home and I feel like as soon as we unpack boxes and start getting settled in and finally start making friends we’re leaving again. Although I have been lucky up to this point in not having him Trust me, if I wanted to I could be quite dismal and depressed.
But I’m not! We have had a very nice place to live in here, the beaches are beautiful, I really enjoy my OB, I recently joined a playgroup and am starting to meet other moms, I keep in touch with everyone back home over the phone, Facebook, and email. Because I have no one to lean on, I lean fully on Bob which has made us closer and stronger as a couple. Even if I don’t like the place we live, I know because of our lifestyle we won’t be stuck anywhere for good. I enjoy getting to see the United States and experience living in new and exciting places I’ve never even visited before.
Slowly, but surely, I’m learning to find and embrace my life in Bob’s. Are you doing the same for your marriage?