At the beginning of this year, nearly one year ago to the date, I shared with you my decision to pick a singular word to focus the year around. The word that was impressed on my mind at the time was Grow. A few weeks later I shared what areas specifically I wanted to Grow In.
And then I went on with my year, somewhat forgetting about my one word for the year. That is, until a few months ago when I was sent the prompt from Compassion Bloggers that it was almost time to pick a new word for 2014.
And I thought–what was my word for 2013 again?
When I went back and looked at my word, Grow, and the post I wrote about it, I was stunned. Stunned, because this must have been a God thing, choosing the word “Grow”.
2013 was the year that I believe I’ve grown the most in my entire life to this point, in every area of my life.
I’ve grown in Health.…finally starting to run, beginning to understand the concepts of moderation, learning the energy and rest that consistent work outs bring, and that you really can miss that time to yourself when you don’t get to do it. Finally reaching the goal weight I’d struggled 3 years with reaching.
I’ve grown in Grace….surprisingly, not at all how I thought I would, but instead by learning that my check list Christianity and false pride were poor attempts at the true relationship God’s always been gently trying to bring me to. By realizing that I have so very, very far TO grow that I have finally been able to start at all. By learning to see my pride for the disgusting sin it was and slowly, slowly, slowly learning to allow God to be in control and learning what it really means to worship and fellowship with Him.
I’ve grown in Balance.…ironically by getting so out of balance and having my health give way for a long amount of time (for me) that I had to step back, take stock, and think seriously about what was really important. Balance by finally consenting that there is no way I can do it on my own, and bringing in help. Balance to be willing to let go of the good to say yes to the best. Growing in Balance is realizing that balance is just that–a continual act of staying up and not toppling down, that must be reworked and retried over and over again.
I’ve grow in Relationships…I’ve seen some flourish and grown–like a living thing they continue to increase in size and deepen their roots. They bring out the best in me, the challenge me to grow in maturity, knowledge, and my walk with the Lord. They help me to see life in different ways-outside of my narrow frame of view, they uplift me, they bless me.
Other relationships have been more like a favorite sweater from 10 years ago, while you remember a time when it fit perfectly and brought you joy and delight, suddenly it feels a scratchy, ill fitting, and you begin to notice it’s now showcasing more of your flaws than it is bringing out the best in your features. These I’ve realized as I’ve grown, are the relationships I’ve sadly grown out of.
I’ve just begun to learn to recognize the difference between those two, and to let the latter fade away or become re-purposed into a new sort of a relationship naturally, and hopefully gracefully, instead of bemoaning and lamenting; kicking and screaming all the way like I have in the past. It’s been a hard, hard area to grow in, but I think I have started to make some progress.
After looking back in amazement and thankfulness for all that God has done for me in 2013 and in all the ways I truly have Grown, I couldn’t wait to pick my word for 2014…..which I’ll share tomorrow!
But grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and for ever. Amen. 2 Peter 3:18